That's what I'm thinking, and what you may be thinking, about my first blog post in like nearly 2 months...most of the time in the past, when I haven't been able to keep up with the blog, I've at least been aware that I'm not keeping it up - and that bugged me. This time, in all honesty, there have been weeks since December where I haven't thought of it. When I would remember it, it wouldn't be with a thought of, "Oh, I definitely need to get back on there, writing and posting pictures!"; it was more like, "Oh. Yeah. I haven't written anything in a while. I wonder if I should just stop doing it?"
The start of the year has felt pretty crazy in terms of schedules and hecticness. Come to think of it, that's just generally how life has felt since my blog post frequency trailed off back in May last year, when we started the work to our house. Along with the chaos of that upheaval seemed to come a general inability for us to keep on top of much of anything; the blog was one of the first things that had to take a backseat to staying afloat in the sea of work, nursery, school, household chores, and all of the things that just seem to make the weeks pass by in a kind of "What just happened there?" way.
In a way, I kind of feel like today is a bit of a New Year's Day for me - even though it's February 17th. Maybe I should just start celebrating Chinese New Year, and then that would be more in line with my lunar and internal calendar.
I got back yesterday from a week in Boston, the second of two weeks that I have spent there this year. In between I went on a course (one of those where you come out of it thinking, that would have all been useful to know 7 years ago when I started doing my job). Mom has graciously spent the last month with us, looking after the boys while I have been away, and I know she is eager to get home and see Dad. We got up this morning to get her on an early train to get the plane from Gatwick, and with clear weather and no snow (as has been the case for my last two trips to Boston, and Mom's arrival back in January), I made the stupidly incorrect assumption that the plane would be departing on time. Mom and I headed off into the early morning London darkness over to Clapham Junction, where with plenty of time, she headed off to the train for Gatwick. It was only when I had arrived back in front of the house that I happened to see on my phone at the online departures page at Gatwick - US Air to Charlotte was showing 3.5 hours delayed! If there isn't an emoticon that would represent that feeling of helpless stupidity, lack of foresight, and inability to change the situation - I would be happy to design one. It would be a bright red face with an enormous wrinkle on the forehead (frustration and angst), with handcuffs on clenched wrists (nothing to be able to do to change the situation!). Poor Mom. I then tried to tell myself that at least she would hopefully be there on time and is safe - so at this point, there's nothing I can do to change the situation apart from try to remember to think about checking the flight before we head off next time. It all seems so clear in the light of day, whereas in the early mornig darkness of a quiet house, I guess we just didn't think to check.
I guess the one good thing to come out of it thus far, is that rather than going back to bed - which I couldn't do (Blake had taken my spot in bed!), I have come to try to put my thoughts down here, which was my original intention with starting the blog so many years ago. So, "it has better be a good one" maybe isn't the right thing to be wondering, whereas "What took you so long?" is perhaps a valid question. Hopefully when Mom gets back today, if Dad should ask her that, she and I will both be able to say that being here now is the more important result. Thanks, Mom. I hope you can find some way of passing the time at the airport and that you'll get home before you know it. We love you!