You'll probably be pleased to see a new post after what, weeks of blogging inactivity?! I do think about blogging every day; making it a reality is a lot harder. So, let's see, what is there to catch you up on....
Last week was a very inspirational and introspective couple of days, as Raina launched her blog and I took great interest in realizing that there were some things I could be doing to be preparing for a better birth. At 32 weeks today, I feel in many ways that this whole pregnancy has been a blur, but I have suddenly had a wake-up call that the next 8 weeks (more or less, of course, due date/schmoo date) are going to go pretty darn quickly. Anyway, from Down Under Raina passed on some recommended reading which I had dispatched from Amazon and then set about to devouring. When I say that Ina May's Guide to Childbirth is the best book I've read in months, I unfortunately have to say that it's the only book I've read in months, but nevermind that. Truly inspirational, it has really turned me on to the fact that there is no reason to fear this upcoming labor and I am now looking forward to setting aside some preconceived notions and worries and letting Mother Nature be my guide. I definitely should have written about this last week as I had a lot more to say that now I can't conjure up! Anyway, watch this space - Matt and I are hopefully doing a hypnobirthing class on Feb 24th which I am excited about (and he is at least open-minded about).
If today is anything to go by, Thursdays are going to become the most difficult day of the week. Blake is sure a fascinating little being, with the ability to make me gaze at him adoringly one minute and then with frustration and fury the next. A big downside of leaving Kensal Rise was saying goodbye to a fantastic group of fellow mother friends who were not only within a 15-minute walk, but were also lots of fun to be with. We haven't yet managed to make any new friends yet here, and the past couple of Thursdays have primarily involved going to the store and doing errands. This morning I was determined to try to do something a little different, if not totally kid-friendly, so B and I headed up to the local cafe on the Rosendale Road parade. They have a little table for kids to color at, and I wanted to get the numbers for a few babysitters I had seen posted on their notice board. Things at the cafe were ok - Blake and I shared two croissants (ok, I probably ate 1.5 and he 0.5) and he was generally in an amiable mood. My next move was probably a mistake in retrospect, but I wanted to get some cream for stretch mark prevention. Yes, this is probably something expectant mothers would do a little earlier in the game, but as I say, time has just flown. Anyway, we headed two doors down to the pharmacy, where chaos ensued as I tried to buy the cream: Blake ran all up and down the two aisles, transplanting Suducrem pots from one shelf to another, before pretty much knocking down about 25 bottles of different varieties of mouthwash (at which point the Indian owner - a nice gentleman, really - said to me "He's wrecking the shelves."). Can I say, mortified? I tried in vain to re-right all the bottles in their various rows but by now Blake had discovered the automatic door and was threatening to leave the shop. The shop assistant came over and pretty much begged me to just let her do it. I am not sure if flee is the exactly correct word for the style of our departure, but it felt close enough to it.
And this is where, in retrospect, I sometimes just have to ask myself, Why would I then do what I did next? In a recent post I think I mentioned the fact that I need a haircut, and there is a salon just next to the pharmacy. Quick pop-in to see if I can get an appointment for Saturday, should be easy...apart from the minute we walked in the door Blake ran back and - he is somehow getting good at door handles - opened the door to leave. I managed to at least make the appointment before we were out in the cold again. Next shop on the strip is a newsagent, so I thought I could nip in and get a quick Valentine's Day card. What I forgot is that the cooler with drinks in it is just at Blake's eye level, so he had moved a jug of milk into the beer section before I blinked. Then he ran and picked up some strawberry Mentos and had run them clear down the other end of the shop before I blinked a second time. Next up, fingering a packet of Rolos to take them to the magazine section. On my third blink, I realized that the card could wait, so I headed for the door. But all this food ferrying was too much fun and so Blake proceeded to go "boneless" and crumpled to the ground right in front of the door in a classic toddler-style tantrum. A lady and her daughter were trying to leave the shop but he was right in their path, so I just muttered "How embarrassing" and she replied with some sort of attempt to be kind. And the final act in this 4-part drama occurred at the dry cleaner. Last Thursday Blake and I went to the Horniman Museum, a very lovely museum not far away with a cute aquarium among other things. They also have gardens, which we explored, but at some point Blake insisted I carry him and he got his muddy footprints all over my coat. I know I don't look the image of "put-together" but going to work with a muddy coat was even too much for me to consider, hence the visit to the dry cleaner's.
What I couldn't have predicted was how insistent Blake would be about trying to gain access to the back of the store through the door in the counter. Cue the screams and red face that I had seen just minutes before. As I was waiting for my stupid card payment to go through, the lady finally said to me, "Do you want us to let him come back here?", to which I replied, "No, thank you, we just really need to get home." In the space of about 7 minutes, I had gone from feeling ok about my mothering skills to wanting to see if there was any way nursery could take Blake for the day - the nursery being tantalizingly within eyesight at this point.
We made it home, and fortunately a nap helped everyone's mood a bit. I woke up before Blake did and just stared at him sleeping sweetly. To think that a few hours before he had been able to raise my heart rate and make me blush and want to scream...
When Matt came home, though, I just had to tell him that I needed to go lie down and he dealt with the evening routine. I wasn't really all that tired but I just wanted to be alone, and in the end I did fall asleep so maybe I was more tired than I thought. I thought I was just running low on patience.
If there is any good news to this tale, it's that I am actually looking forward to going to work tomorrow. And then on Saturday, I'll get my hair cut, if I can remember what time I made that appointment for.